I love the way you reflect on things. It is so helpful to me.
This, exactly: "Could I explain to my friends that I want to see them, but we need to structure the time and circumstances so that I don’t get overwhelmed, irritated, or exhausted? Or would that be too burdensome? For example, let’s meet for an hour to go for a walk instead of having a three hour dinner party."
Yes please!
One of the things I enjoyed about getting sober was that my social network shrank to include only the people who were willing to accept the new 'quiet and boring' version of me. It was fantastically relaxing.
I didn't realise it but I was learning to accept my unmasked self, my autistic self.
And I am still having the same challenges you describe. I've made progress and I'm having challenges.
The yes/no thing is confusing to me too. I still find it so hard to understand when I am 'allowed' to say no. Which helps me see this is a worthwhile challenge. Because the point is that I am supposed to be the Purveyor of my own no's. But historically haven't necessarily been. I think the female conditioning really gives us born female a lot of extra trouble with this...
My friend pointed out that Mum's might benefit a lot from the yes/no challenge.
What are the parts of you that you find hardest to accept? Something I'm experimenting with accepting is how many naps I seem to need.
Is it possible that I could simply stop fighting my need to rest. Could that be something I just said YES to?
A nap every day. In the middle of the day.
I think perhaps. Will write about this in my post.
Bit rambly but basically THANKS! I so love getting to think with you on this stuff ☺️
And thanks for the acknowledgment of my quest too!
I love the way you reflect on things. It is so helpful to me.
This, exactly: "Could I explain to my friends that I want to see them, but we need to structure the time and circumstances so that I don’t get overwhelmed, irritated, or exhausted? Or would that be too burdensome? For example, let’s meet for an hour to go for a walk instead of having a three hour dinner party."
Yes please!
One of the things I enjoyed about getting sober was that my social network shrank to include only the people who were willing to accept the new 'quiet and boring' version of me. It was fantastically relaxing.
I didn't realise it but I was learning to accept my unmasked self, my autistic self.
And I am still having the same challenges you describe. I've made progress and I'm having challenges.
The yes/no thing is confusing to me too. I still find it so hard to understand when I am 'allowed' to say no. Which helps me see this is a worthwhile challenge. Because the point is that I am supposed to be the Purveyor of my own no's. But historically haven't necessarily been. I think the female conditioning really gives us born female a lot of extra trouble with this...
My friend pointed out that Mum's might benefit a lot from the yes/no challenge.
What are the parts of you that you find hardest to accept? Something I'm experimenting with accepting is how many naps I seem to need.
Is it possible that I could simply stop fighting my need to rest. Could that be something I just said YES to?
A nap every day. In the middle of the day.
I think perhaps. Will write about this in my post.
Bit rambly but basically THANKS! I so love getting to think with you on this stuff ☺️
And thanks for the acknowledgment of my quest too!